It takes most of "Wrath of the Titans" for Hades (Ralph Fiennes) to forgive Zeus (Liam Neeson) for banishing him to the underworld. You know how gods are. You think you're bad, they really hold a grudge. Forgiveness is for demigods and, as snob Hades sneers at one point during the movie, "there are many useless demigods."
On the other hand Zeus has already forgiven Hades for treating him abominably down in the underworld's Tartarus -- chaining him up while all of his godly powers leak out of him and are absorbed by his daddy, Kronos (who, in this film, is quite scary -- a sort of walking volcano, mountain-sized and with fire shooting out of eyes, mouth and hands).
Zeus seems to be on some sort of program. You know, how to be a better god.
Just as Zeus seems on the point of death, Hades forgives him.
So, there they are, bros from Olympus back together again and at long-delayed peace. Zeus' white hair suddenly darkens again and his body strength returns sufficiently to burst his chains.
"You look 10,000 years younger," says a surprised Hades.
"Let's have some fun," says Zeus. Just like when they were frisky, angry young gods -- you know, shooting lighting bolts from fingertips, kicking butts and taking names.
Some fun indeed. I had plenty, actually, at "Wrath of the Titans." I'm not going to tell you that any man, beast, monster, god or demigod would think it's a good movie, but the special effects are nifty in their rugged way and at least one of this movie's several writers has both a subversive sense of humor and some gratuitously brainy Jungian ideas of how gods behave and talk to each other in megaplex FX extravaganzas.
Not only does Zeus look 10,000 years younger after Hades forgives him, but after triumphant son Perseus (he slew the Kraken in "Clash of the Titans," don't you know?) rides on his winged horse Pegasus, he dismounts and scowls at the horse, "You used to be lot better at this."
This is the kind of movie, in fact, where Zeus actually tells Perseus "being half human makes you stronger than a god, not weaker" an idea so profound and rich in implication that no amount of cheesy spectacle and loud cheesy spectacle music can drown it out.
Don't tell me there aren't real possibilities in the tale either. What's happening here is that people aren't praying to the gods anymore so they're collectively losing all their juju. Kronos, then, wants to soak up all of his son Zeus' remaining power for himself.
And warlike Ares -- always a troublemaker and all-around divine pain in the tush -- just wants to bounce people off rocks, and slice and dice everyone else.
The gods, then, are vulnerable all through the movie -- especially Zeus, for whom this movie amounts to just about the worst press possible. Somewhere in the afterlife, that consummate god of thespian arrogance, Lord Laurence Olivier is standing by his portrayal of Zeus in Ray Harryhausen's original 1981 "Clash of the Titans" and looking down with contempt at his successor Neeson in the remake's sequel.
Zeus in chains? Weak as a kitten? Full of promiscuous forgiveness for gods and monsters both? Say what?
There are, of course, lots of monsters in the neighborhood to spice things up and give the boys and girls something to fight -- cyclops, many-armed dragon beasties, etc. And there are decent actors here to take the big parts -- Bill Nighy as Hephaestus, Rosamund Pike as Queen Andromeda, Sam Worthington as heroic Perseus who'd really rather be fishing and Danny Huston as a Poseidon who turns to stone and crumbles.
The effects are spiffy relatives of the comically spectacular chintz of those by original maestro Harryhausen. A long wandering sequence, in fact, in an underworld labyrinth is actually quite good by any 3-D film definition and needs to apologize to no one.
Good? Hardly. Be serious. Good fun? By me, yup. When it was over, I felt 10,000 years younger.
WRATH OF THE TITANS
2 and 1/2 stars
STARRING: Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, Sam Worthington, Rosamund Pike, Bill Nighy, Danny Huston
DIRECTOR: Jonathan Liebesman
RUNNING TIME: 99 minutes
RATING: PG-13 for intense sequences of fantasy violence and action.
THE LOWDOWN: The gods are in deep trouble and need half-human Perseus to come down to the underworld to save their bacon.
jsimon@buffnews.comnull
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